of phew!

of phew!

well, here I am, back again, it’s very plain looking but I’ve worked out the new password thingo and I’m good to go …b it sad about pics etc but I’ve got most of them elsewhere so I guess no big deal – anyone know how to do a copy of all posts to a safe place? I’m sure there must be some way and I know it’s probably easy but I’ve really just no interest whatsoever in the technical side eg working stuff out so if anyone can point me in the right direction that’d be great.

In other news … can’t remember where I got up to but red gates are on, gabions are finished, we’ve worked out which solar gate opener we’ll be buying (when the tax cheque comes!), and that’s about it.

We planted 2 blueberries today (Brigitta and (I think) Northcote), to go with the other four poor neglected little bushes, they will be getting lots of tender loving care in the second week of my hols (first week we’re away to hopefully warmer climes) -used my own home made compost (yay!) and free pine bark mulch from the forestry up the road (also yay!) … am researching what other plants I can use that little resource on as I’m liking the free part very much – and the just up the road part, and the entertainment for JD the Wonder Dog part (he does like a good snuffle around).

Thankfully I don’t have a bunged up back this winter (SO yay!) so I will be able to give the orchard some tender loving care – of which it got absolutely none last year and hence basically just sat there this year – though the cherry trees did have some fruit so maybe they like a little neglect …

Anyway, that’s it for now, off to do some research (after a little facebooking of course!) :)

of gates and gabions

of gates and gabions

They’re done, hooray! Had to get another load of rocks delivered today, and we still have some of them leftover (which will be distributed in various places around the property at some point), but the second gabion has been filled!

Second delivery of rocks.

Second gabion filled and finished.

Gabions and gates complete – hooray!!

of procrastinating (and new gates)

of procrastinating (and new gates)

it’s late, I should be in bed, have been watching Star Trek :)

here’s a couple of pics (if I can remember how, if not they’ll be up tomorrow) of our new gates – three cubic metres of rocks to go into the gabions – we finished one today :)

Mr Tasmania built the gates himself.

Mr Tasmania building a gabion (rock basket)

The gates (not our car :) – a friend dropped in to help put the gates back on the poles – they’re heavy!)

Site Supervisor – JD the Wonder Dog

One filled gabion next to new gates with old gates / fences in foreground – one more gabion to go – tomorrow – assuming we can actually move tomorrow when we get up! :)

of amazing men part 2

of amazing men part 2

Can you believe I didn’t put my dad in that list? Apart from my husband, he’s the most amazing man in my life, always … there’s so many good things about my dad that even the really annoying stuff (he’s seriously the skinniest man alive, for a voluptuous girlie that’s a bit of a bugger ha ha, no genes passed on there!) pales into insignificance. He’s definitely human but he’s definitely lovely.

Oh yeah, and while I”m at it, my father in law, all 92 years of him, is not bad either – he calls me girlie, which is hilarious, and used to sit in the back seat of the car when we went to Hobart so I could ride in the front with Mr Tasmania, who drove (this is significant, trust me, the first time it happened my husband couldn’t believe it, he’d never seen him do it for any of his other daughters in law …).

gosh, lots of good men!!

Feeling quite blessed really!!

of amazing men

of amazing men

I have (and have had) a number of them in my life, some who I miss greatly (my mum’s dad), some who I only see on Facebook (the 3 of them live in Queensland), my brothers, some of my brothers-in-law (I’ve got about 5 or so – some are not quite brothers in law but that’s another story), my Tassie mates, and the one I’m writing this about – my lovely husband.

Many things I could say about this man but I’ll just stick to this today … turns out the first job off the rank had a closing date of today (which I discovered as I turned off the computer last night, on the way to bed) not Friday .. which gave me a massive case of the shits to be honest … so I was just going to throw in whatever sort of application it turned out to be and just treat it as the first toe in the water … like I said before, a new job is not necessary at this point but the possibility / probability that it will be not far down the road, and the lack of opportunity here at this time, means anything that looks half way reasonable should be at least applied for.

anyway … I wrote up my bits this morning at high speed and saved them to his computer. He had a look at them during the day, rearranged them, added an intro, and sent them to me on my private email so I could check them out while at work (briefly, in a break I might add!).

Tonight I slapped it all together properly, he went through it all again, then we sent off the application.

I’m sure the lovely Deeleea will probably find it hilarious / unbelievable that I can’t write a decent job application .. but it’s true … I can edit the hell out of anyone else’s stuff, constructively criticise, rewrite if necessary, and turn a pigs ear into a silk purse (or even say ‘it’s awesome, it needs nothing’) … but writing my own stuff has always been a real battle. By shuffling my stuff around and adding in some great bits of his own my lovely boy freed me up to critique my own work, which was great. It’s absolutely not the best application I’ve ever put in and I would honestly be gobsmacked if I got an interview from it … but it’s started me off and I will now get completely organised so if anything amazing comes up I’m hot to trot.

It’s a weird thing, not being able to put on paper what’s in your head … but I’ve worked out over the years it’s the ‘overwhelmingness’ of it (new word of the day!) … essentially, it’s like it used to be in infants school when we were told to paint a picture … of anything!!! 2 worst words in the world for me – I need boundaries .. paint a horse, paint a flower, draw a garden / house / helicopter!!!!!! Lots of scope within 4 walls, waaaayyyyy to many variables and opportunities from now walls at all!

So, to finish what I started, thank you to my amazing man, who really does understand how my annoying brain works (or doesn’t!) and knows exactly what to do to make things work :)

of starting the winter ‘quick dinner’ stock up

of starting the winter ‘quick dinner’ stock up

yum, the bacon potato and corn soup experiment worked … even though I had to use beef stock ’cause had no chicken (seriously, 8 boxes of beef stock & consomme and no chicken? Can’t blame anyone else ’cause i do the grocery shopping) … think I might try it with ham bones next – and some dutch creams .. the nicola potatoes are good but you just can’t beat a dutch cream for yummy.

I can’t, unfortunately, just come home and grab a meat pie or a pizza and chuck it in the oven … and when we’re both getting home in the dark (not quite yet!) and it’s raining and freezing cold in the middle of winter (or, possibly, summer in the northern hemisphere – wow, you guys are having some seriously sucky weather at the moment! All my sympathies!!!) I really need some good, healthy, quick meals that we’re both not bored to death with.

So, soup as above is the first one – was very yum and will freeze up nicely – thaw, microzap, and chuck in some fresh chives / parsley (not for him, he hates it) and it’ll be a fabulous easy dins! Tomorrow I’m on the hunt for gravy beef and marrow bones to make up a nice beef stroganoffy stew in the slow cooker on Saturday (will be another experiment as I have not cooked stroganoff without onion before … may well be making the dogs day in the end!).

of getting on with it

of getting on with it

okay, rant is over and reality has reestablished itself :)

this job hunt IS different to those of the past where I was renting, by myself, with minimal savings, and had either I finished a job and desperately needed another one or so hated the place I was working in that I just desperately had to be somewhere else for the sake of my own sanity.

This time I am married (to a man who is fully employed), am paying a mortgage (which is actually less than rental in Sydney was, so yay on that) and we are ahead on it, we have savings, I actually like the job I’m in and it’s only circumstances outside my control which make it time for me to start looking for a job .. and there’s no real rush … probably around June there would start to be a real rush but right now, no real rush.

And if I profess to be any sort of Christian at all, with any sort of trust at all, I need to hand it all over (as per usual – I have given myself this speech endless times over the years!) and not try and do it all in my own strength.

So, having sorted all that out in my head – and by going ‘blah’ all over the wibsite ha ha – I can now calmly and sensibly go about my business …which so far means that I’ve dusted everything, vacuumed like the house has never been vacuumed, cleaned the highlight windows inside (ths involves ladders), and am now sorting out all the filing (which has not been done for nearly a year – there’s a lot).

But I’m in the process now and that’s good :)

of change and hating it

of change and hating it

I”m not good at change, I never have been. I adapt to situations if I have to at work, in life, etc but change in the things that I want to regard as substantial platforms of my life eg family, home, work, church etc I do not like change. At all. In fact I hate it. I do not cope with it. I find it so stressful in every possible way. Especially when it’s basically taken out of my hands and I have to make a change and I don’t want to.

I’m a grown woman, very capable in many many areas, and I know quite a few people who would be really surprised at how much change can upset me. I mean to the point of wanting to run away upset me.

So, anyway, work is basically in chaos at present. I work for a government funded not for profit in an area which the government is making a great number of changes, most of which are really really good. These are however impacting on the auspicing body of my unit, and also my unit directly, and have been impacting at glacial speed for nearly 6 years now (almost the entire time I’ve been employed) so it’s been almost easy to just ignore them. Now they are all coming to fruition at great speed (there’s an election in September, which might have something to do with it!). Money is being taken away, redistributed, changed etc and basically nobody’s job is safe.

Add to this chaos within our auspicing body itself which I won’t go into except to say that it’s above management level, this level above is not talking to anyone below it and a large number of people are ‘potentially’ being impacted … so it’s coming from two sides.

So, do I look for another job? Do I put in applications for jobs which I think I can do even though it makes me feel like a rat deserting what I’m pretty sure is a sinking ship (mostly through no fault of the people working there) or do I hang in to the end until I’m made redundant (possibly / probably – nobody knows – either at the end of June, or the end of September, or possibly even next March) with possibly no job opportunities around at that time?

I see items in the news all the time saying how amazing Australia’s unemployment levels are compared to the rest of the world – 5%’ish or close to it I think … which is great – except that I live in the state (Tasmania) that is bumping that average up .. it would be smaller if not for us – we’re on something like 11% and rising … so jobs are thin on the ground and getting thinner.

Mr Tasmania is very supportive, looking out for jobs he’s sure I can do, and encouraging me at every point – but he has no issues changing jobs, will do it at the drop of a hat if necessary, so probably really does not understand how upset it makes me. I’m sure some days he thinks I’m being a massive drama queen … and so do I but some days it’s just how the stress of it comes out.

The food intolerance / other illnesses issues I’ve been diagnosed with and discovered with lots of medical assistance / intervention in the last 3 or 4 years are not helping my worry about this – I have never enjoyed changing jobs, I interview very well I’ve been told but I’m not a sales person, I just will not / can not pretend to be something I’m not so I’ve probably lost jobs on that basis alone. I’m worried now because I’ve never had to go into a job knowing I’m hauling some medical issues with me that will have to be taken into account. I will need time off for medical things, there’s no two ways about it, so I can’t lie about it, can’t fudge it, it’s just reality … and while there’s supposed to be no discrimination in this sort of process I know I can be dropped from a list of possibles based on this but stated to be based on something else very easily – I”m sure this is not a new issue to those who have had ongoing medical / disability issues for years but it is for me, at this late stage.

Anyway, basically I’m cleaning the house. I have two jobs I could apply for, I haven’t even touched my CV in 6 years, I don’t want to update all my information or even find all my certificates (not that there’s been many, not that much training available in my part of the world for my job and my employer has been turning down most applications for training for the last couple of years so not much point in applying for it anyway), I don’t want to have to start gearing myself up to do job interviews … and arranging myself at work so (assuming I did get an interview) I could attend them without me employer being aware of it .. without directly lying about it … guess my habit of just saying “I’ve got an appointment” instead of staying I’ve got to go to the doctor / specialist / medical centre etc will probably stand me in good stead there, even though it would be a lie of omission I guess …

I guess my last experience of job hunting has not helped me either, when I first came down here I had a job that didn’t work out so I left it …. and didn’t get another one for nearly 3 months … and realistically, although it has worked out really well for me, if it wasn’t for the incompetence of the manager at the time, which has led directly to the current problems at work, I wouldn’t have the job … quite bizarre when I look at it that way …

It just sucks.

I know I don’t have to do it all in my own strength. I have God, I have my husband, I have friends … but that doesn’t stop my brain running at a million miles an hour trying to work out some way of doing it without freaking myself out.

So, back to the dusting …. and then the vacuuming … and possibly the high windows in the lounge …

My brain might be in a mess but my house won’t be … I guess that’s today’s silver lining.

of friends on a journey

of friends on a journey

A person who I would call a friend but in reality I have never met in person or in any other way than online via an odd comment or two has ended their blog. I understand all the stated reasons why, they are very sensible and well reasoned. I realise (obviously) I only know one tiny section of this person, that none of us put all of ourselves out there on our blogs … though I guess if you blog long enough you can put a fair bit of yourself out there – even bits you didn’t know you had :)

Regardless … I have enjoyed reading the blog, following a journey which is a completely different to anything in my life, finding out stuff which has challenged me, interested me, excited me, and made me look at a few things completely differently, as well as realise how I actually felt about a few other things … some has been confronting but most has been educational and interesting.

So, I want to say thank you for your blog, thank you for putting a lot of extremely personal stuff out there about a journey which is completely alien to me and letting me attempt to understand a little of what life is like in your shoes, and thank you for spending as much time as you have on it.

And now go out and enjoy yourself without being “chained” to your blog :)

of days off

of days off

which it isn’t really :) … Mr Tasmania is away, left straight after work yesterday, picked up a mate in Launceston, and headed off to the East Coast (Binalong Bay / St Helen’s) to play golf. They’ll be heading back to Launceston tomorrow to play golf again, visit Bunnings (very very large warehouse style hardware store – closest to us is in Launny,as Launceston is known in Tasmania, and it’s a 2 hour drive away so you take any chance you can get to visit), then head home, due to arrive some time Sunday arvo / evening.

It’s a long weekend so that means we get Monday to spend together, yay!

So, what am I doing, with 2 days to myself? My nails, shopping, lunching, morning / afternoon teaing, generally slothing about?

No, I, on a very hot and windy and humid day, have just put out the third load of washing (new quilt cover (not fun to hang out in a 25km/hr wind but it will make it dry faster and smell very fresh)), have weeded some of the garden, have poured 12 watering cans full of water and fertilizer on various plants and sections of the garden (there’s a lot of walking involved in that, it’s a big space, and they’re 9 litre cans!- and I had to water the dog as well, he loves it), and now, instead of slowing down and doing something restful, I have just washed half of the floor in the top part of the house, on my hands and knees, like an old fashioned ’50′s housewife!

I love our floor, if you look back in the files to September / Octoberish 2009 you’ll see it’s a very solid heavy duty floating floor, laid by yours truly and Mr Tasmania, all 120sq m of so of it … it’s beautiful, I love it, and have no regrets in choosing that type of floor. The only down side is that you can’t wet or steam mop it … water will break glue seals (which pretty much are broken anyway, just from walking on it), seep through seams and into the underlay and into the particle board below it … which would swell and warp and do very bad things to the beautiful floor above it … so I’m not even tempted to try it as an experiment, particularly after the hard work it was laying it! (there’s a lot to be said for having ownership in your home by doing as much of the work as you’re able :) ).

So yes, hot water, minimal amount of wooden floor cleaner, microfibre cloth, large heavy cotton bath mats to sit everything on and to step onto, and down the hall way (2 metres wide) and all the kitchen are D O N E done hooray!

This just leaves the other half of the kitchen space ie the dining room, then the living room …. the dining room I am doing tomorrow, the living room ….well … that may have to wait a bit longer … it doesn’t get the sticky foot traffic that the ‘upstairs’ (it’s split level) gets so it hasn’t had as many scuff marks on it … AND it’s got lots of furniture and large mats in it, none of which I’m really inclined to move …. I think I’ll just give that a really serious vacuum and then possibly a go over with a barely damp microfibre mop …. just to get any stubborn stuff off … it’s actually making my head hurt thinking about it.

That’s all very domesticated I know but shortly I will be taking a shower and getting ready to go out raging for my Saturday night … yes, the nonagenarian (90 and 92) parents in law and I are going out for Chinese …. we’re so Hollywood :)